12/09/2006

dancing flesh

Photocase524212952 i am just hearing so much about this. napapanood ko sa tv, nababasa ko sa news. and i was very curious how it is done.

and then that fateful night. i had my first. My first striptease show.. nowhere to go to or rather undecided where to go, a friend and i passed by this narrow door with blinking lights and decided to come in. the guard ushered us in and lighted our way into a table. a fat lady (whom i suppose is the bugaw kasi kamukha niya mga bugaw sa tv) approached us. it was past midnight and as everyone else is asleep, some people in that tiny dark room are dancing to slow music with just a bra and a panty on. then as the music progress, in a flash, all the covers are gone. and every man's eyes are wide awake. i just cannot imagine how the show affects these men. Dancing flesh within arm's reach. butt-naked. twisting and turning and splitting.

grabe, mixed emotions. i don't know if how  would i judge these girls.. skimpy clothes, no panties walking around, some nakapulupot sa kanilang customers, whom i am guessing are already married men. But in fairness, "bawal humawak" as what i overheard from one of the girls. alright, money matters, family problems. won't talk about that issue here. i went inside that room out of curiosity at hindi himayin ang reasons why they do that. Whew. i just hope, paggising nila sa umaga, tao pa rin tingin nila sa sarili nila. After taking a shower in front of male customers with nothing on (soaping every curves and crevices erotically of course and urging some customers to soap them anywhere), only a gipit na babae can do that. O wag na humirit. yep, not all gipit can do that but it is their choice. They seem so sanay as smiling sweetly while seducing their male customers, flaunting their assets. Or they just havo no choice...

I've heard news of showgirls/dancers/ GRO complaining that a customer took advantage of them, in short binastos siya. Naman, did they expect ba that a lalaki would still be saintly if the girl who is sitting on his lap is wearing nothing underneath? idagdag pa ang influence ng alcohol at ang ambience ng club. it is their choice and dapat panindigan nila.

....huhummm... of course, wala ako napala sa panonood ng striptease kundi awa sa mga babae. eoww. just cannot imagine paano nila maatim na lumingkis sa mga lalaki na kasing-tanda na ata ng tatay nila. and i just cannot imagine how they stripped all their clothes off every night showing the world their kaluluwa but still can manage to smile and carry themselves like nothing happened.

ehem, by the way, excuse lang po sa mga relihiyoso. i know.. i know.. what the bible says. but learning is not just about learning from own experience but also learning from other people's experience. Now that i've seen the reality, eh magandang I reflect on my life and thank God that i am so lucky i don't have to go through what these girls have been through. Yaiks, di nako maimagine akong self. Thank God :) and help them..

anyway, what's next with my list of curiosities? let me see...
male stripteasers!!!! wahahaha. (psst.. ansama ng tingin ni best - 'yaw pumayag :( . promise best, i won't look wahehe.

11/14/2006

an almost perfect description about me...

Kimbell_carnival_2



Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly.  Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
      

9/13/2006

the tomboy in me part 2

Katebeckinsalehq11_1 

Sabi ko before in one of my old blogs - ung "the tomboy in me", na di ko na gaano crush si kate kasi over-exposed na iyang beauty. but then sa CLICK, grabe, ang ganda at sexy nya noh? :) hehe. so much for this (baka pagalitan na ako ni best at mainsecure - not sa mga guys but sa girls, hahaha).

snake encounter...



Imagine this. 500 provoked, poisonous and deadly snakes on the loose. nothing to run to. nothing to hide. all u can do is scream (to scare the snakes off - swerte mo kapag natakot sila sa sigaw mo, nyahaha)..

hay grabe, sa wakas at napanood ko na rin. eeooowww... hanggang ngaun, i still can feel the shivers. 500 snakes on a plane!!!! with passengers and crew aboard, yaiks, i can't imagine. it's a nice movie especially if you looove snakes (like i  do :).. dnt wori, it is not all screaming and running - may comedy / humor din.. whew, may pamparelax ng kaunti. Tsaka,  it's not all snakes - may human interest din :)

un nga lng, ul wonder how nakalusot boxes ng snakes sa airport security. baka it was shot in the Philippines???!!!.

7/27/2006

moving on...

I've moved on after my affair with GRP-CCCH. Now, i am moving on with my "career"... back to being an NGO worker. it feels good to be back.. no time pressure, no one to run after, hawak mo oras.. output-oriented.. no need to report 8hrs in an office, klaro imong work!!! whoah.. doesn't mean to be offensive or unfair. It's just that, you can't help but compare (siyempre nman, marami ring kapalpakan ang NGOs, but choose the lesser evil, harhahar!)..

Peacewithin1 

Now, i am with PRRM for an 8-month (or less) consultancy proj. la lng, updates lng with what i'm doin with my life.. maybe, my career will revolve na around NGO works.. di nga lang stable, pero at least, may fulfillment ka. (char, drama..). Di ka tlg yayaman dito pero ok lng, maeempower nman the people you are serving to, in someway or another ha. Cool un di ba? Mahirap din maging NGO worker kasi nga, negative tingin ng ibang tao with the objectives. So be it. You can't impress all of 'em. Importante, you do ur job well and committed ka to help the community or ur beneficiaries. After all, sila ang dapat mong iimpress at isatisfy. Kaya nga, may NGOs kasi may mga tao that need us. Of course, the compensation is higher than a regular govt. employee receives pero the risks are much higher din.. di pa jud stable (now u work, now u don't - ang drama).

So much for my advocacy. Baka patayuan na ako nito ng NGO which i will direct. hahaha! Hmm..on the second thought, di masama ha..

6/25/2006

my one-month affair

i had a one month affair...
 
Loveaffairprintc12313537_1 

It started on may 11, 2006 but ended just recently - june 21, 2006. One month and ten days to be exact.. it started when a friend told me about him.. i was never hesitant to know him better. i was too eager, too excited..at first, ok ang lhat. pero weeks after, parang hindi na.. problems arise between us. waah... ang gulo na.. ng isip ko, ng lahat. with so much thinking (as in grabeng muni-muni), i realized that di kami bagay. huhuhu ansakit tlg but i need to make a choice..


i call him GRP. as in GRP CCCH. Govt. of the Republic of the Phil-Coordinating Committee on the Cessation of Hostilities. Haba ba ng name nya? oo nga e, bago ko lng din namemorize. Whew, kidding aside, my one-month stint with GRP CCCH is full of memories (cliche jud pero true). Dami friends, dami experiences and dami places napuntahan. Been to Basilan! cool. at least, di na jud ko maigno unsa'y itsura sa basilan.

I never regret my stay with GRP. kasi andami ko natutunan. especially sa peace process. unsa ma'y peace process bih? hehe. basta, i've worked with MILF members who i thought were all war freaks but then, with GRP CCCH, ul realize na sila pa diay ang hadluk sa war. Marami lang silang pinaglalaban that people esp christians should need to understand. Di po sila nakakatakot. Sana lng, magtuloy-tuloy ang peace process at maging maayos ang resulta. drama na ito pare. harharhar. kahilakon na ko. i may have quitted with GRP CCCH, still aabangan ko pa rin what will happen next sa mga ojectives nito. Peace for Mindanao - who doesn't need it??? Bless the people who work there. Bless the GRP and MILF na di sila magsawa sa peace-building acts nila. Bless the GRP Peace Panel (whom i had a bad memory..) na maging sincere sila (sana may matamaan!! :).

Hurrah for peace! Let us pray and work for peace. Let us support the GRP and MILF Ceasefire Committees. (mangamp anya ba?!, hehe). Now at least, nalaman nu na na may dalawa palang opisina sa cotabato city na nagkakandahirap para ma-achieve ang final peace sa Mindanao. Kahit anliit ng pinansyal na suporta ng gobyerno ng Pilipinas, tuloy pa rin with the work like peace advocacy campaigns, monitorings, bantay-ceasefire.. iniisip na lng ng mga tao dun ang magiging resulta ng final peace agreement - which Mindanao and the whole Philippines will benefit. Siya nawa.

Maybe, u r asking y did i leave GRP CCCH... oo nga noh? bakit nga ba... ah kasi, di kami magkasundo. Mahirap namang peace process ginagawa nu, if di nman kau magkasundo, useless lng din. Hehe. But i know, someday, magkikita kami uli nito.. tuloy ang ligaya, tuloy ang paghahanap sa kapayapaan (hoy magpakita ka na!!!)
ang gulo ko na, kaya gotta go :) zooommm...!
  Mainpic_peace 460_0___30_0_0_0_0_0_grat_jul_02_1

1/12/2006

mindfreeze a.k.a. tinatamad

MINDFREEZE


I am trying to write a composition

But words just don’t come out.

I am trying to make a poem

But words simply don’t fit.

I am trying to think what I really want to do

But my mind just goes blank.

I am trying to be a somebody

But I guess chance is very elusive.

I am trying to change the world

But I guess the job’s not for me.

I am trying to make sense

But these crazy thoughts are filling in.

(aarghh…)



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